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One... two... whatever... we've all been in the situation where the need arises and you are unable to just take care of business and are forced to wait... when the moment comes where you are able to escale to the facilities, there is a mad rush. your more primal instincts begin to take control and suddenly, you are having trouble undoing you belt or zipper or whatever, but you are acutely aware of evert sound around you, ever molecule of air, you can see every crack and scratch on the floors or walls... sometime you cut it close... too close for comfort. sometimes you aren't so lucky... we have all had those moments. they aren't our proudest moments. they are secrets that we bury in our subconscious, or we try to force them from our memories as fast as possible...
those days suck.

... ... ...

but somehow... despite knowing better... despite trying to be a better person... it is morbidly funny seeing someone else suffer the same indignity.

well, you feel bad... but it does make for a funny story later...

unless they didn't make it...

then it's sad...

or really, really funny...

depending on the person...

if that ever happens to me... i hope there aren't any witnesses... because other people would have too much fun with it...