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so I stopped collecting comic books a while ago.

I have a huge gambit collection - basically ever figure and statue made from his inception to about 2002... I have many of the key comics which feature the cajun although I know I am missing severl important runs and individual comics (like uncanny #273 where gambit kicks wolverine's ass - it's true - look it up...)

but I've stopped collecting. I don't know if it's because I feel that I have matured enough to put all of this behind me or I'm just too lazy to go through the work to track down and buy all of the things I am missing, or if I am just overwhelmed by the amount that I do not have... because technically there is really no end until the x-men are finished and gone...

[oh - and what's the deal about killing off gambit in the ultimate x-men series?]

there were rumors about josh holloway (sawyer from lost) playing gambit in x3, but that's out... I heard keanu wanted to play him as well... I'd vote for sawyer over neo though, although I think gambit is a little more lean than sawyer and much more smooth... but he's an actor, so maybe he can act...

but I digress, so the question remains...
do I keep all my gambit stuff, of do I pull a 40-year old virgin and sell all my stuff?

right now, it's just taking up space in my closet in the spare bedroom...

do I end it, calling the race done... or do I keep running and finish the race...

I don't know... I just don't know.

so it happend again last night... I dreamed a dream [of days gone by]

except I don't remember most of it. I remember, though, the british and the indians were in it and I think they might have been fighting a war... but it was in some sort of futuristic setting and there were hostages of some sort... really, I just remember feeling conflict.

I awoke [singing, ooooo, only thing to do] - I notice that I had left the TV on the history channel and there was documentary about some british/indian war or something... I don't know... I promptly changed the channel to headline news because I needed to get ready for work.

are we meant to remember our dreams? there doesn't seem like there is enough time for our dreams to move from our short term to our long term memory... memory is a finicky thing, it is... so why do we dream? to keep our sanity? to unwind the mess of the day so that we forget what is necessary to keep moving? if you remembered everything as strongly as you first felt it, would you not be immobilized by anger or dispair or sadness? or would that be cancelled out by every joyous moment, every gush of pride, or fit of laughter...

I don't know.

but dreams can be fun... and dreams can suck.