babiegoose.com

So kimmie and I have a debate regarding the lyrics to Insomnic by Billy Pilgrim (which is the name of the band, not a single person, and is taken from Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse-five main character)

she posted her thoughts last week... I'm posting mine now.

so here's my theory...

be sure to formulate your own before you read this because I don't want it to influence you... but you might think it's dumb so there is probably no danger in that...

I can see you, don't even know you,
falling into the sheets at night

[so this is me telling you what I think the lyrics are about - he's in his bedroom in his apartment, and he can see out the window... maybe just a crack because he has drapes that are covering most of the window - in any case, he can see, across the way, a woman going to bed]

I place my hands flat on my chest
I feel the heart beat back the night

[he lies back into bed, and he is experiencing what we call "a crush"]

I try counting sheep, and I talk to the shepherd
And I play with my pillow for ever and ever

[umm, he can't sleep - he's probably thinking about her in some capacity or another]

I sit alone and I watch the clock
I breathe in on the tick and out on the tock

[still trying to sleep and get his mind off her]

[refrain:]

I can hear your bare feet on the kitchen floor
I don't have to have these dreams no more
Cause I've found someone just to hold me tight
Hold the insomniac all night

[he imagined what it would be like to be with the stranger across the way, dreaming about her, but now, he has found somone real, and he no longer has to dream about the stranger, because there is someone to hold him...

of course - that was the refrain and hence the epilogue, but we go back to before - when he was still dreaming about the stranger across the way]

Dig my head down deep so I can't hear the cars outside on the street
And the stars are laughing
They get a kick out of my misery
I tried everything short of Aristotle to Dramamine
And the whiskey bottle

[STILL trying to get to sleep, he's miserably because he doesn't (at this time) have someone to love - and now he's becoming a paranoid, philosophical, alcoholic - poor guy... :-P]

Pray for the day when my ship comes in
I can sleep the sleep of the just again

[Basically, he's wishing that finally his turn will come for love, and they he doesn't have to dream and/or be kept up all night about thoughts about a woman he doesn't know and can only see from a distance - once he finds love, he can sleep peacfully... Back to the refrain a couple more times and a happy ending because the refrain implies that he found somone...]

SO, that's my two cents...

what do you think?

I arrived in New Orleans yesterday... flight was nice and I slept the whole way (and the flight attendent even left me pretzels... I love the pretzels on NWA). I have to add that there were tons of college kids from U of M on the plane headed down for Mardi Gras, so I was so glad that I was upgraded to First Class. I don't remember being that crazy in college... but we probably were. Anyways, once we landed I had to wait forever for my luggage. But at last, I retrieved my luggage and was picked up by our company shuttle. This was the part that sucks. Our hotel is right on Canal Street in Downtown New Orleans and since I didn't get in till 5, the shuttle couldn't drop us off at the hotel. We have a remote lot about 8-9 blocks from the hotel and so we walked... with my luggage... and since its Mardi Gras time, it was company policy to walk in groups of 5. Luckily for me, I had a group of great people who carried and/or pushed my luggage for me. It was fine until we got about 2 blocks of the hotel and then there were just tons and tons of people lined up waiting for the parade to begin. But we arrived and I settled in. I had a great view from the 34th floor of Canal Street so I was able to look out of me windows at the floats... there were some pretty cool ones down there. For those who have not been down here for Mardi Gras, they have parades going on for weeks leading up to Mardi Gras and there are different parades every night. Last night's parade supposedly draws the biggest crowd since it featured the Krewe of Bacchus floats. It's pretty neat being able to experience it even though I was never a big fan of Mardi Gras.

Anyways, since I was so comfy in my room, I decided to just get room service and continue watching the floats and Grey's Anatomy...I paid $17.15 for a sandwich and a 10 oz. pop. The pop alone was $3. How insane is that? It totally stinks, but I was starving and wasn't about to head out to get something.

Well, I have 2 more days of the Mardi Gras craziness... I guess the whole place really shuts down at midnight Tuesday/Wednesday in observance of Lent. The police actually will get people off the street so the cleaning can begin. I may venture out one of these nights just to check things out a little bit.

Oh, and it's crazy to see the waterline on the homes that were underwater...

one of the crews today saw Lenny Kravitz in the lower 9th ward, which was the hardest hit area... he was walking around filming footage... I also heard Willie Nelson and Jim Belushi were in town... I totally want to meet someone famous... but I never do.

And FYI, never talk back to Louisiana Police...I hear they get really really mean...

that I would not blog for a while...

yeah... I lied...

there are just too many moments of down time - and mixed with the fact that my productivity is inversely proportional to the amount of time left (aka procrastination) there is just no denying that I will take 5 -10 minutes to try to get my mind off work...

so I'd like to share with you one of my favorite moments...

basically it amounts to me and lorie sitting at a piano with me struggling through the sight-reading of different tomes of music (mostly pop hits, love songs, and broadway musicals) while lorie tries to sing to my inept accompaniment.

she turns the pages as I try to synchronize my left and right hands...

you see, I have a pretty good ear, so I can sound out music pretty well... I can sight read with my right hand by itself very well, and I can sight read with my left hand by itself very well...

putting them together... complete anarchy. it is like I adore and despise structure all at the same time. I like order and find comfort in it, and yet I like chaos and find comfort in it...

what is wrong with me?

oh - so thinking about how well I sound out songs... yeah - usually the song has to be in some sort of marjor or minor key close to C - because, as you know, C (in the world of the piano) as no sharps or flats. therefore, an transposition around C will have minimal number of flats.

I particularly like songs with F-sharps and C-sharps... don't ask me why... I just do... after that I like songs with B-flats and E-flats.. again, it's just one of those things that I can't explain.

so if I am making up a song on the fly, I'm probably going to throw in those keys if possible... probably not in the same song unless I can manage to get a key change in.

but yeah... playing the piano is probably one of my most favorite things in the world... strange - since I used to despise whole-heartedly practicing...

Nowadays, I enjoy playing it more when no one is listening to me - since I'm usually less self-conscious...

... ... ...

I wish I had a piano here...

it is a great stress reliever...

kind of like vacuuming [for me]...

... ... ...

any how.. I love playing the piano with lorie singing...

that's all...

as it so happens I will be swamped at work for the next few weeks...

this will probably mean that I will not be checking or creating blogs, as a certain unnamed someone that is pissing me off at work. and I need to eliminate any possible excuse for his slacking off...

arrggghh... it stresses me out just to think about him...

sadaspo difuapsodifu erkq;wlrkejzoixu zoixuvy,me rntemrbt,mwe ncvox uybsaldfh lkjsahdflk uyobixcvyb iuyxcovubyer,tmbert b,qmwnebr

go here...

seriously... it's not as much fun as it used to be...

it's actually not fun for me anymore... it's almost like work...

I really don't think I could do it for a living... once things start feeling like work, it quickly loses the fun...

I can't focus...

dude.

I want it to be fun again.

you know... unless there is a reason for me to do something at a certain time, I cannot make myself do something until I feel like it...

take this morning for instance...

I woke up at 6:30am - plenty of time for me to get up and shower and get to work early (as in 7:30am)

but no.

I get in at 8am, because I have nothing to really motivate me to get in 30 minutes early. no meetings, no deadlines, no phone calls...

nothing.

if I do happen to leave early enough, I'll go grab breakfast somewhere, because I have all this extra time.

... ... ...

kind to like parties or dates or something.

if it were not for lorie, I'd be late to everything...

well, not everything, but most things which means meeting up with people for parties or shopping or leaving to drive somewhere for a weekend...

why?

because parties do not require me to be there to get things started. I figure, why put undue pressure on me to hit a certain time? I have enough of that with work, so I'd like my life outside of work to be as stress free as possible.

which is why I have decided just go with the flow...

party starts at 7:00pm - so maybe I'll get there on time, and maybe I won't... I'm not the only person going, so why make a fuss - not to mention the awkward silences experienced when sitting around waiting for people to show up - "oh, so, um... how's work/things/significant other/family/etc?"

bleeech - I'm all for conversation, but forced conversation is not fun... it's almost like work.

because shopping can be done at any time. if you want something badly enough you will get it no matter what time it is - if you don't - you can probably find it online because waiting for something to come in via rain check just takes too damn long...

because leaving to drive somewhere for a weekend usually means you are on some sort of vacation, and those should be relaxing and hence you should leave whenever you feel like it, not because you are rushing to get somewhere...

... ... ...

don't get me wrong - it's not a matter of respect or disrespect - it's a matter of sanity...

something which, as of late, I have been in short supply...

... ... ...

it's peanut butter jelly time
peanut butter jelly time
peanut butter jelly time
where he at
where he at
where he at
where he at
there he go
there he go
there he go
there he go
do the peanut butter jelly
peanut butter jelly
peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat.
peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat

bored for a minute...

saw pam's survey...

decided to post it...

1) Using FOOD names, spell out your name
r-avioli y-ogurt a-sado n-ilaga

2) Have you ever had a song written about you? do the ones I sing about myself count?

3) What songs usually makes you cry? Sad songs... they say so much.

4) What songs make you happy? fun techno, 90's hip hop and rave, 80's pop, showtunes

5) What do you like to listen to before bed? cartoon network or late night talk shows

HEIGHT: 5'5"
HAIR COLOR: black
PIERCINGS: two - left ear, but have, as of late, been unoccupied
TATTOOS: no
COLOR PANTS YOU'RE WEARING: banana gray, with white pin-stripes
SHIRT YOU'RE WEARING: light gray mohair v-neck sweater, diagonal striped button up with french cuffs

LIP GLOSS FLAVOR? um... burt's bee's or blistex lip medex
WHAT SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO? unwell

WHAT TASTE IS IN YOUR MOUTH? red bull
WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE? freezing, with lots of snow everywhere
HOW ARE YOU? fine, how are you
DO YOU GET MOTION SICKNESS? not lately, but it depends on how long it's been since my last really bad hangover.
HAVE A BAD HABIT? scab picking
GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS? yes
FAVORITE CONDITIONER: whatever lorie leaves in the shower
FAVORITE MAGAZINE: entertainment weekly

HAVE YOU EVER
BROKEN THE LAW: yes
RUN AWAY FROM HOME: never
SNUCK OUT OF THE HOUSE: does a bear shit in the woods?
EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING: yes
USED YOUR PARENTS' CREDIT CARD: yes
LET A FRIEND CRY ON YOUR SHOULDER: yes
CHILDREN: next couple of years
BEEN IN LOVE: still going...
HAD A HARD TIME GETTING OVER SOMEONE: a few times
BEEN HURT: not really
YOUR GREATEST REGRET: none...

RANDOM
YOUR CD PLAYER HAS IN IT RIGHT NOW: greenday - american idiot
IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? graphite
WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY? being with lorie, snorkeling off a tropical island coral reef
WHAT MAKES YOU THE HAPPIEST? when everything is right and I have nothing to worry about for a while...
WHAT'S THE NEXT RECORD YOU'RE GONNA GET? depends on what's available on vinyl

WHEN/WHAT WAS THE LAST
TIME YOU CRIED? when I was hung over and puking in the shower (a few weeks ago)
TIME YOU GOT A REAL LETTER? written by a person that is not an invitation to a party? I think a year and a half ago...
YOU GOT AN E-MAIL: non-work, non-spam? last night.
TV PROGRAM YOU WATCHED: headline news
MOVIE YOU SAW: mind hunters (blockbuster)

ok - so thanks to paolo for letting me know, but google is working with the libraries of Harvard, Stanford, the University of Michigan, and the University of Oxford to scan their collections...

go here to see what I mean...

due to copyrights and what not - most searches will only display a portion of the book - so you won't be able to read the book cover to cover online...

UNLESS... the copyright was not renewed or the book was written prior to 1923...

after looking up stuff about copyrights I found that all books published prior to 1923 are public domain (in the US - I don't know what that means for foriegn books, but I know that I can read and search through through the looking glass and what alice found there online - want to read about the jabberwocky - search for it, want to know about the tweedle dee - google it...)

in any case, you can do search for complete books and then browse through or search through an individual book.

seriously - it's AMAZING...

once they are finished it will be even more amazing.

unless you don't care about books, then it's probably not such a big deal for you...

if the book's copyright is still in force, they will tell you where you can find the book in a library or they will link you to a place where you can buy it...

the project will be on going but apparently it was announced in december 2004... but check it out...

pretty sweet.

i know there are much better ways to block spammers, but right now, I'm just not in the mood to figure out how and put the effort into installing such magical devices...

right now it's just easier for me to ban ip addresses.

so that's what I'm going to do... until I find the time to install one of the wonderful widgets which will wipe wantonly written words from the comments...

so for the four people who leave comments - if you have a problem, e-mail me... and I will fix it...

or just tell you tough cookies.

depending on my mood.

I essentially spent a year living in connecticut.

if you would have asked me a year and three months ago - "would you ever live in connecticut?" I would say... "No way..." it was never one of the places that I ever thought I would stay, let alone live.

of course, that's nothing... lorie has been living in southern illinois for over two years... so really, I've got nothing on her...

but I'm going to be done with connecticut. probably never to return... unless my children decide to go to yale. but that's way off... considering that children aren't even close...

what does connecticut have? well, culturally speaking, I've only been to this anthenium place, where they have works of art... I also caught a jazz quartet there once. I saw the colt building - I think it's where they actually made colt handguns... there's also a river here. I drive by or over it every day. never really pondered it. I went to foxwoods and won two c-notes... I went to a restaurant that used to be a bank in which there is a vault that has tables and chairs for dining. other than that, it is your quitessential generica.

generica: the copy-and-paste cities that surround one or two social/business centers which included cookie-cutter homes, the smattering of big-box stores, shopping malls, and large chain restaurants, the death of small, local retailers.

the only thing different about the different parts of generica is the climate and the scenery.

so there are large cities with downtown areas, small cities with downtown areas, and generica. and farms. and slums. and trailer parks.

ugh. nevermind. this world is to big for these sweeping generalizations - a lot people won't travel more than 500 miles from their homes

so the tenet is that once you become comfortable at what you do, you need to start moving on, because what you are doing is no longer a challenge... so you need to keep growing.

I think it has something to do with the increased sense of urgency which I would assume is a good motivator - [which I think is a reason people procrastinate, because nothing motivates like a deadline that is 24 hours away] - it keeps you sharp [we hope] and thinking and moving and whatever (but as a blanket statement, that doesn't work because some people just don't care about anything and have no sense of urgency and there for are never really motivated to do anything.)

so when it gets easy, you get lax - because it becomes mundane...

sometimes I think I'd like a job that I can work 10 hours a day which doesn't require me to be stressed or to deal with idiots or to produce anything...

then I think... how boring.

... ... ...

I think I really want to be a carpenter when I grow up - because that would be cool - potential injuries aside. there is just something totally satisfying about building stuff...

the only problem is, I read that the average salary of a carpenter working independently is somewhere around 30k/year without benefits... at this point in my life I don't think I could make that kind of life change.

... ... ....

but who knows... a little bit of planning goes a long way.

I'm stopping my train here... I need to get back to work.

"Your fans are gospel folk, Johnny. They're Christians, and they don't wanna hear you singing to a bunch of murderers and rapists, tryin' to cheer 'em up."

"Then they ain't Christians."

... ... ...

I'm probably a little late on commenting about this, but this has been riding the news wave for a little while now...

I can't speak for anyone else, but if you draw a picture of Jesus that I find offensive or even blasphemous - I am probably not going to riot and throw rocks and what not.

I will probably be upset that you would have the insensitivity to create something like that and then the malice to show me...

and depending on how big a jerk you are you are, I will potentially berate and belittle you because I'm not a perfect person.

if it's in the paper, I'm not going to buy it or read it.

if it's on the radio or tv, I will change the station.

if you proclaim it from on high, I will leave the vicinity.

but I'm not going to kill you... I won't even try to hit you.

I could understand if it was posted in a public place in plain site where you really had no choice but to be faced with it... but there is legal recouse (in the states) to have stuff like that taken down.

... ... ..

I applaud their devotion. I disagree with their execution.

... ... ...

but I don't know...

that's just me.

... ... ...

"Think for yourselves and let others enjoy the privilege to do so too." ~from Voltaire's Essay on Tolerance

good people of earth,

I know that all of you have mail of some sort, of the snail variety - and therefore receive junk mail...

Please note - the envelopes in which the snail mail arrives contain other envelopes which are postage-paid business class envelopes which is paid by the companies who send you your credit card, home loan, sweepstakes, etc. application forms through their tree-killing correspondence.

when you receive this junk - please take a few moments to stuff the contents of that mail (including the outer envelope) and send that junk mail right back to the sender (on their dime)

this alleviates two things - the amount of recycling you personally have to do that week, and a little bit of stress due to the satisfaction of sticking it to the man.

this is not my idea, but tony s. I just wanted to share it with the world.

have fun!

Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm

Maybe surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh I miss you, you know

And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home

Let me go home
I’m just too far
from where you are
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
But this was not your dream
But you always believed in me

Another winter day has come
And gone away
And even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be allright
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home

~Home, Michael Buble

I just don't understand
Why you're running from a good man baby
Why you wanna turn your back on love
Why you've already given up
See I know you've been hurt before
But I swear I'll give you so much more
I swear I'll never let you down
Cause I swear it's you that I adore
And I can't help myself babe
Cause I think about you constantly
and my heart gets no rest over you

You can call me selfish
But all I want is your love
You can call me hopeless (hopeless)
Cause I'm hopelessly in love
You can call me unperfect
But who's perfect?
Tell me what do I gotta do
To prove that I'm the only one for you
What's wrong with being selfish?

I'll be taking up your time
Until the day I make you realize
That for your there could be no one else
I just gotta have you for myself
Baby I would take good care of you
No matter what it is you're going through
I'll be there for you when you're in need
Baby believe in me
If love was a crime
Then punish me
I would die for you
Cause I don't want to live without you
Oh what can I do?

You can call me selfish
But all I want is your love
You can call me hopeless (hopeless)
Cause I'm hopelessly in love
You can call me unperfect
But who's perfect?
Tell me what do I gotta do
To prove that I'm the only one for you

Why do you keep us apart
Why won't you give up your heart
You know that we're meant to be together
Why do you push me away
All that I want is to give you love
Forever and ever and ever and ever

You can call me selfish
But all I want is your love
You can call me hopeless (hopeless)
Because I'm hopelessly in love
You can call me unperfect
But who's perfect?
Tell me what do I gotta do
To prove that I'm the only one for you

Selfishly I'm in love with you
Cause I've searched my soul
and know that it's you
Selfishly I'm in love with you
Cause I've searched my soul
and know that it's you
Selfishly I'm in love with you
Cause I've searched my soul
and know that it's you..

To prove that I'm the only one for you
So what's wrong with being selfish, selfish, selfish, selfish...
So what's wrong with being selfish...

~n sync

what do you like more - cheetos crunchy or cheetos puffs?

I myself, I'm a crunchy...

I know a few people who like them puffed...

and I know one who likes them stale.

weirdoes.

Randy: that’s a man chicken. They’re the meanest of them all. They got that red flappy thing on their mouth. I don’t even know what they make that out of... I’m afraid of birds and I don’t care what you think of me.

Catalina: its ok. We all have our fears. I’m afraid of snakes and rape.

~My Name is Earl, Barn Burner

just this very moment, I realized that I like reading from books. That is assuming that I am trying to read pages at a time - or rather, I like reading off pages.

here's the problem - I'm a big fan of searching through text. obviously, it is much harder to search through text manually than if you had computer do it. So I'm a big fan of computers doing searching through text.

I guess the best way to alleviate this problem is to scan every single known book so that the text and captions can be searchable and store it electronically.

I'm sure that this is being done for a number of books, but I don't think they are doing it for all textual material.

do you realize the implications of that?

first, we could store it somewhere on the web, in a format that cannot be easily altered (so we don't have an editing or version control problem)

second, we wouldn't have to traverse the country for a specific tome, or better we could share information between schools.

third, we could bankrupt publishing companies and the manual spell and grammar checkers (although I would assume that some manual process would have to be done as no automated process is entirely perfect) - but not that this is a good thing...

but the problem would be that you would run into the whole digital information infringing upon profits of the companies that make them - so sell subscriptions - $10 a month for unlimited access or $1 per MB downloaded or something like that...

another problem would be to get all of the text into a digital text format - it would be especially hard for eariler works, and if there were hand written documents, any hidden messages could potentially be lost...

there are probably bunches of other issues with this whole thing, not to mention money and storage space, and maintenance, security, and retrieval times and what not...

plus, I think the the scanning process could destroy certain volumes since the book would have to be taken apart in some cases to scan it.

but books can't last forever, and I heard somewhere that if something makes in on the net - it is virtually indestructible.

think about it, with wireless technology exploding, how cool would it be to bring up any page from a book in a moment's notice. people would be able to quote authors directly, follow procedures, etc...

once you get all the books in history input into the database of books all that would be left would be each and every book that came out every day, and how hard can that be? :-P

plus, we would have the added benefit of removing from the historical record all of the bad books ever written...
:-P

::: ::: :::

In the defense of keeping paper books, having a library would be neat... you know, the big ones with the huge books and the rolling ladders and the leather winged chairs with a huge fire place and nice rugs and curving stairs...

of course, that requires money too...

and it's a bit frivolous.